Reality Bites

Bravo to Bravo-TV for landing their new hit series Being Bobby Brown. So far, the crack headed cast is the highest-rated show in Bravo television history. No small feat when you consider that Being Bobby Brown had to outperform such award-winning series like Celebrity Poker, Queer Eye, Blow Out and 16 nail-biting, chillin' hours of West Wing repeats. Now Whitney can get those illusive drug-dealing receipts she so often mentions.

I was in an Atlanta grocery store when two white women were expressing how bad the Bobby Brown reality series is. They started whispering when they saw me. I guess they thought I was going to tell Bobby that they didn’t like his show. Maybe they thought I was Johnny Gill. White people can be so foolish at times. Actually, my first thought was….., is there such a thing as a good reality series? What were they expecting, The Bodyguard? Waiting To Exhale? Or some of Whitney's other stellar performances? I must admit, I watched Being Bobby Brown; if for no other reason than to thank the good Lord for Being Ray Lewis. Bravo’s ratings would have been even higher had I had a Nielsen Box or paid for cable. It should be noted that I offered BET $100.00 per month if they took BET off of my cable system. My frequent calls to Bob Johnson/ Viacom went unanswered. Bob can be so sensetive when one is not appaulding his Tip Drill Video rotation. What an ass.

For the record, I think reality shows are great for the network executives. After all, they pay an untrained staff a few hundred thousand to “act” like straight idiots (or themselves, which ever is more foolish) and advertisers pay real money to be sponsors. I wish I’d thought of that brilliant scheme. But, not to be out done, I did think of a few reality series that I’d push to some NET Heads.

When a Man loves a Woman, then Becomes One: The Star Jones/ Terry McMillan Story.

Back Street Boys: The Michael Jackson Story

Pimp My Thighs: The Oprah Winfrey Story

Pimp My Ride: The Eddie Long Story

Is He Really Coming Back Here: The Frank Ski Story

Without Beyonce, are we just hoes: The Destiny’s Child Story

Baby Got Back: The Matthew Knowles Story

Is That My Soap: The Lil Kim Story

Where’s my Dictionary: The Magic Johnson Story

Cutting Up: The O.J. Simpson Story



1 Love,
Ray Lewis



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